Nachos for breakfast & so lucky to have them

This morning I got up shortly after 5, was up, dressed, caffeinated and out for a walk by 5:30 am. The air was breezy and comfortable -65 degrees out - a balmy day in a heat wave. I walked for a full hour - more than usual and came home hungry.

Poking around in my kitchen looking for some breakfast - I came across Mexican corn chips and oddly they were calling me. I spread them on a plate and decorated them with southwest style diced tomatoes, a mixture of black beans, brown rice, barley, peppers, onions, spices and a sprinkle of pepper jack cheese. 

I slid them into the microwave with anticipation and was not disappointed....

So yes, (maybe for the only time in my life), I had Nachos for breakfast. Lucky I am to have a meal at all, a natural place to walk and a present peace however long it lasts. So much of the world is in rubble, in danger, cold or hot and hungry and thirsty, worried, fearful.   

I'm not powerful or influential. I'm not even particularly friendly or social. not a person who is necessarily agreeable. There are people who would say I'm a total shithead And nobody is reading this for sure. 

I can't do much, but stay informed, vote, donate to aid orgs, help when I'm able. The news, both local and global breaks my heart. 

Age-related Downsizing - Relief!

Before I moved (back in February,)  I lived in a 75 year old 4 bedroom house whose systems were aging poorly. I didn't choose it, I didn't buy it. I'd inherited it. 

I deeply appreciate my good fortune. That said, I've come to realize how much of my life energy was consumed by memories of the past, sorting the piles of  memorabilia inside, by worry about what to junk, what to keep or give away, what problem to fix, when to fix, the order of fixes, prequals to each fix, and researching contractors and their proposals. It was endless and I was out of my depth as a elderly female never involved with the building trades. As just one person taking up so much space I didn't need - well that bothered me quite a bit also....

I admit I enjoyed the front yard: having coffee on the bench in front of a dwarf lilac I had planted for my Mom. I even enjoyed mowing, snow shoveling, shrub trimming in the front yard - up to a point.  But trying to contain poison ivy, invasive weeds, an out-of-control hedge, a half dead blackberry patch and an overgrown uneven backyard became too much - tics, thorns, yellow jackets, large fallen branches, etc...  

Combine those stressors with the increasing traffic in Danbury! There used to be shortcuts I knew to avoid  jams. But there has been so much construction - so many new apartment complexes in all those formerly under-built areas -  even my back roads were crammed with traffic most of the day.  And My location was at the top of a steep circle without sidewalks or shoulders - not a safe walking spot especially in winter. My habit had been driving somewhere else to walk.  But now the traffic - and crazy stressed drivers - ah well.

After 11 years of fence sitting about leaving, my move was sudden. On New Years Day I had no inkling - it wasn't on the agenda.  By last week of January I'd made an offer and was packing like mad. By February's end I'd secured a new home.  I moved into a 1 bedroom condo in a 55+ complex with various places to walk to without driving and a little garden area right out of my door, a landscaping crew and enough units that local contractors consider it a "market" and are familiar with the units and the rules.  

The house went to flippers, who gave me a detailed repair plan, and got a bargain for their trouble.   

No regrets. Just immense relief and time to think about other things.

 

Time Rolls, yes it does, no one stands against it

You’ve got one life - do what you can while you can! Friendships, institutions, traditions you rely on appear then vanish! Disasters happen! Defend yourself as best you can!

Life is messy and difficult, so beautiful and brief.  Be alive until you aren’t- don’t give up contributing to the human story —even if nobody seems to hear, offer up your heart!

The backhanded non-apology....

 Got creeped out recently on the phone when a computer voice interrupted  - - "This call is being recorded!"  I said what the heck is that? And it suddenly said it again. I insisted the caller turn it off and said little after that. As always when I don't know how to react -- I don't. 

The next morning I woke up already a bit freaked out thinking about it. This person I was talking with posts nearly everything she does on Facebook - lots of selfies with groups of people she knows and places she's gone. Has to always have a social plan to go somewhere or be with someone. Hates to be alone. Also talks endlessly about what this or that person said to her - no matter if the conversation was yesterday or 60 years ago.... 

When I texted her saying to record someone secretly is really a betrayal of trust (also illegal which is why the app alerts people!)  Rather than apologize, she turned it right back on me - saying the presumption and assumption of malice in my reply was shocking and calling her mean was hurtful. 

But I never called her mean. I had asked what she planned to do with the recordings -post them to Facebook? She's pushy rather than mean, kind of bullying the reluctant into doing what she wants, or repeatedly asking very pointed questions for personal info which I had always found troubling.  Being more or less easy going I'd  awkwardly blurt out the answer and be filled with regret afterward. 

But recording me was a bridge too far. Way too far. And apparently there were two recordings - which she stated and claimed to have deleted, saying they were "gibberish" anyway. So she reviewed them before deleting. To see if they were useful? To see how the app did at recording? 

No regret was expressed. "I'm sorry you feel betrayed," she said. Not sorry about what she did, just sorry I found out and felt betrayed....

OMG I've moved.... I'll never find anything again

 Oh yes, I have pulled up stakes and moved, boxes and boxes I thought I'd never be done but finally after endless trips, I moved the last box. I'm still exhausted. No words of wisdom here. Just plunge in and do it!

That said - I'll still be unboxing sorting and tossing in September.