Grief Hazard
Boxes neatly packed
stacked in closets
under tables
stowed in odd spots
boxes unlabeled but for
a single word: Mom.
.
I packed them last year
numb not knowing
what to do
I packed for days, hid
this and that away
carefully wrapped,
and now
.
I wonder
what memories hide
in each, if I look....
maybe not right now.
Defensive
Little crab has backed into a corner.
The backwards days are over.
Side-to-side is not an option.
.
Little crab waggles eye stalks,
blinks, raises claws,
ready to go forward.
Go forward or bust.
Hopeful Signs
Peek out of the cloud
eyes right, eyes left
sniff the air for clues
If I begin, when I begin
what to do.
.
The paperwork is mostly done
a mountain of it
and now hope like
clarity beginning to form
as the clouds part a little
the rain lets up
a few green shoots emerge
Hiding Out For A While
Home is where you are safe
where you can be alone
without despair
.
Where you know
which windows will let in the sun
what cabinet holds the tea
.
Home where the familiar hides
you from change
at least for now
The Novice Orphan
I'd lost at love
at money
I'd lost at friendship
and achievement of all sorts
I'd lost bets,
keys, cups of coffee
by the dozens
Lost my place in books
lost my way in travels
lost my breath while running.
But when it came to
losing you Mom
last of my parents
I had nothing to go by,
When we lost Dad
it was you and I
WE lost him.
And now I have
lost you as well.
No sisters. No brothers
to share it with.
No preconceptions
No idea what to expect.
no experience
no armor.
------ Mar (Mistryel) Walker
Far
Everything is blurry
and far away now.
Things recede daily
as I run towards them.
.
The universe expands
faster and faster yet
my world seems to
contract like a spasm
.
or a fist raised
against grief.
-- Mar (Mistryel) Walker
